Premium Toilets anyone?

I'm back in Seremban and was just lazing around with my chips and beer. Thinking about my weekend.
Weekend was good. Had fun with Little Alya, my niece, and my family. Bought a new pair of jogging shoes. They are pretty cool! Talk about running barefooted!! If my feet can look as good as those pair of shoes, I would sell them off!

Aren't they just gorgeous? Love them! Comfy good looking shoes and it cost RM329! Bur wait there's more, RM50 voucher is given! That's about RM280 for a Nike shoe! It's the Nike Free 5.0. Yummy yummy! And it's one of my favourite colour, BLUE! I still love my old jogging shoe, eventhough it's pink! hehe I'm not a pink person. There are only three things I own which are pink: my Nike shoes, my iPod mini and a formal shirt. That is ALL!!
Ok ok I had to brag a bit about my new pair of shoes. It's just too gorgeous to pass it up. ;) Anyway, coming back to the title of my post, I was in Low Yat Plaza when nature had to call! Frantically looked around for the washroom. Found it. It says 'Premium Toilet' RM1 per entry. WTF?!! RM1 to go toilet?! Nature call was really urgent. So, heck I had to pay the RM1! What service do you expect when one pay RM1 per entry? Super high class toilet rite? Seat warmer or something with pretty decorations. WRONG! It looked so ordinary that I prefered the Metrojaya washrooms which are so much better and the best thing is it's FREE! Even those in Starhill were unique and free. It looked like any other washroom, slightly cleaner I guess. You get to choose how much water to waste: big button, more water to flush. If I had a camera I would have taken a photo of the washroom. Sheesh! Not impressed at all! Premium toilet my ass! My friend's house bathroom looks even better and I rather pay her! Might as well go back in time....

To dye or not to dye?

Today I was thinking of dye-ing my hair. Wanted to do something weird with my hair besides cutting it really short all the time. I never really want to spend so much time and money to make some funky hairstyle or to colour it or straighten it or curl it or to do whatever possible things you can do with your own hair. It's just not... me. Anyway, I was in the mood to actually do something with my hair. I thought highlighting it was pretty cool, cheap and fast. Being the "kiam siap" fella I am, heck with the hair saloon and take the cheapest way, buy the dye from Watson and DIY!
No 1 problem was what colour wouldn't be so horrifying if anything goes wrong and not so subtle either if it goes right. Difficult choice --> Blond? Red? Ah Lian? Ah Beng? Hmmm... In the end I settled with a colour called deep burgundy.
Problem no 2: Who do I trust to be my own personal hair-dye-er? My hair is in your hands... Obviously I chose a girl to do the job coz I can't find any guy friends who acted gay enough to be considered as a hairstylist or a good taste in hair sytling.
Problem no 3: Read all the the instructions given inside the box. Cut a portion of your hair, dye it and wait for 48 hours. What the.... My hair is being lab-tested! I'm not gonna wait 2 days just to see how the colour look like on a portion on my hair!! Skipped it. Test a little bit of dye on scalp (or was it skin?) and wait for 48 hours. Allergic reaction. It's like doing investigations on myself to rule out my differential diagnoses. What next? Imaging of my skull for any fractures? Skipped that too. ok, yadda yadda yadda. Let's just do it!


After sitting my ass off, with weird shapes and sizes of aluminium foils on my head, it's result time...... not much difference. Damn! My friend said maybe more dye should do the trick. I gave her the green light. Ok, after a few more butt sores, let's take a look. Does these







look anything like this colour??!!

No! None! Elek! Takda! Nadda!
*grumble* grumble* grumble* ok, maybe a little bit on the fringe.
Well, at least my hair didn't turn out to be a disaster like these sexy ladies!

"Mating" Pressure

The definition of mate ---> a good friend or companion, a spouse
The definition of mating ---> to join closely, to unite in marriage, to be paired for reproducing
So, the definition of "mating" pressure ---> to force or stress a good friend or companion or spouse to join closely (meaning like siamese twins??) or to unite in marriage or to be paired for reproducing (this is meant for animals, but then again humans are considered animals sometimes)
Somehow in my context it just mean "Fuckbuddy". Don't you think so?

Anyway, let's not dwell on that. The "mating" pressure I mean here is that I've been observing my friends for the past year and when it's nearing the exams, which is a VERY stressful situation, it seems that people like to mate at that critical moment. It's like one couple get together and the rest follow suit! Something like follow the leader kinda thing. Sem 7 BOOM! 2-5 couples blooms, Sem 9 BANG! 2 more! It's pretty interesting. So, what I wanna know is, is it due to the exam stress? Or is it due to being pressured to find a partner?
I noticed that the couples in the beginning usually deny that they like each other. Boy meets girl, become closer and closer, denies they like each other, firmly state they are JUST GOOD FRIENDS and before you know it they annouce "oh, yeah, we're a couple now". Sheesh! Denial then acceptance. Hmmm, sounds familiar... Maybe in between there's sadness and anger. Interesting.
Anyway, I'm really happy for my friends and wish all the best to them to find their "soulmate" :) And for those who haven't, you're in the DENIAL stage!

Denial & Changes

These past few weeks have been weird for me. Weird in a way something is bugging me and I don't know what it is. Or maybe I do know what it is but I'm just denying that's the reason. Denial is a very hard thing to accept. Thoughts of "no, that can't be it" keep running through my head. It really hit home when my closest friend said it out loud. I just broke down there and then and realized it's true that what I've been denying all long is the reason.
I know life has it's ups and downs and it's one rollercoaster ride which you can't get off midway. Everybody's life been there, done that. It's the aftermath that really test your ability to adapt to the changes. Just like the September 11 horror or when Italy won the World Cup 2006. By the way, that was a really cool headbutt Zizou and to end your career in such a dramatic way. Let's see that action again.


Anyway, personally, it all boils down to how are you going to accept and adapt to the changes. It's going to be a year and I thought that I would have adapted to changes in my current situation. Apparently not. I know life was going to be hard but facing the truth is tiring. Been going through denial, acceptance, then denial again and the process repeats. Now I'm in the acceptance stage and it hurts real bad. It feels like you're the loneliest person in the world and you're facing the cold hard truth. Watching my friends going to the next stage in their career was hard enough but to watch them go to the next stage plus moving away altogether just kills me. I know in the end of our university life we would go our separate ways but not being able to celebrate together with them is just brutal. People say, don't worry, we won't forget you, we are still your friends. It's just not the same. I feel like I'm not in that batch and neither am I in the new batch. I feel like an invalid sometimes. I know you'll say, you can always make new friends. New friends already have their clicks and old ones of course will always be your clicks but it's just different. Different timing, different grouping, 300km away...
It's just that you are so comfortable with your current life and BAM! one day, suddenly everything changes.

Failure

As the Semester 9 exams are approaching for my friends, I can actually feel the anxiety and panic attacks of what they are going through. It can be really unbearable and everything just crashes down on you.. "Oh no, I haven't studied that" or "Shit, what have I been doing for the past postings??!!" It's pretty scary to see your friends being stressed up and knowing that your turn will come. Listening to them about how scared they are about not doing well and worse still of failure. They already think of failure even before they take the exams. Some went as far as saying, "Jess, if I fail, you have to leave a room for me in Seremban so that I can stay with you" I was like, no, you won't! Just study whatever you can! Don't be so negative. I guess sometimes our friends just need some reassurance that they can get through the exams.
I still remember my own failure. It was a really hard time for me. In fact it was traumatic for me. It was Semester 7 exams and after doing all the papers and practical exams, I just have this gut feeling that i was at borderline. Seriously.. But I prayed sooooo hard that i won't get it. But i did. It was viva borderline for my OSCE. When i read my ID no on the list... everything around me kinda faded away. There was ringing in my ears and i just couldn't believe it. I mean, I kinda expected it but for reality to hit me like that was such a big blow! My close friend at that time saw my facial expression and he asked what's wrong? I just couldn't utter the words "It's me".. The viva was that day itself and I knew that I will fail just like I knew i would get bordeline. When the results were out, my housemate sent me home and i just cried and cried and cried. How was I to face and tell my parents? How can I face my friends? What am I to do? My close friends were there with me.. But it just didn't matter..
The following days were the toughest. I couldn't eat or sleep properly. I just wanted to stay to myself. I didn't wanna talk to anybody. I didn't want to join any outings or activities at all. Worse of all I had to start my semester again and I had to start the following week. I keep asking myself, why me? What did I do wrong?
Starting the semester was hard for me.. I had a new bunch of people to know. And the hardest part of it all was when they ask me why am I in their posting? The next hardest thing was watching my friends going ahead of me. I felt so alone in that situation.
One thing I learnt was there are people who are caring enough to help me through it. One was my parents and sister. Next was 3 people whom I don't really know well. The most amazing thing was I got to know my si-fu. I didn't know him that well and he readily helped me through my exams. He just came up to me and told me if I needed any help, just asked. I am so very grateful to him. I am grateful to my other friends, make no mistake about that but for a person who doesn't know me that well and offering his help is just so touching. :) Another is the guy who also didn't pass his exams but has gone through a number of failures in his life. I didn't know him at all but the sms-es on how am I doing and not to give up really meant a lot to me. It's just so facinating that someone actually care about me other than his own failure! I really respect him and admire his courage as well as his will power to carry on! One more guy was actually just a hi-bye kinda friend. He was there to talk to me and encourage me too. He helped me to see things differently and try to be positive. He is one of my closest friend now and I really appreciate his friendship. I also got to know a few other people who are also my close friends now. A guy and a gal. (You know who you are! hehe Don't get too flattered la!) I also got to know my housemate better. She's real cute and helpful! Always trying to get me out of the house when she herself antisocial!! hehe It's not so bad after all, if you have friends like these to support you through. I'm really thankful I got to know these crazy people. They light up my life! :)
Come to think of it, failure is really a traumatising event in ones' life. But to experience it was a lesson to me. It taught me that there are strangers who help with all their hearts without anything in return. It opens a new perspective of how things can happen for the better.. sometimes.. It also helped me to be brave to face a new challenge unexpectedly.